Sam Lynch: Music

credits LYRICS LISTEN ↗

OUTLINE
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Released 2024.

ALL THE LIFE
HURT
DOING MY BEST
INTERMISSION
GETAWAY CAR
TEETH
PIECE OF YOU
MOTH

All songs written by Sam Lynch
All songs produced by Sam Lynch and Sean Wharton

Engineered by Olivia Quan (tracks 1, 2, 3, 6) and Sean Wharton (tracks 4, 7, 8)
Additional engineering by Sean Wharton (all tracks), Luca Fogale (tracks 6, 7), and Jon Anderson (tracks 5, 6)
Additional production by Jon Anderson (track 5)

Mixed by Jon Anderson (tracks 1, 2, 5-8) and Sean Wharton (tracks 3, 4)

Mastered by Philip Shaw Bova

Recorded at Monarch Studios, Good Hideout, Brantford House, and Protection Island Studio, on the unceded territories of the Musqueam, Squamish, Tsleil-Waututh, Katzie, and Kwantlen First Nations.

MUSICIANS

Dylan MacDonald: guitars (1, 2, 3)
Jon Anderson: drums, piano, bass (5, 6)
Josh Contant-Perdue: drums, auxiliary percussion (2, 3, 6)
Kris Ulrich: bass, guitars (1, 2, 3, 6)
Luca Fogale: synth (6)
Sam Davidson: clarinet (1, 4, 5, 6, 8)
Sam Lynch: vocals, guitars, synths, piano, drums (1-8)
Sean Wharton: synths, piano, harmonium, drum programming, strings, daruan (1-8)

1. ALL THE LIFE

I’ve been getting to know myself
Online surveys about mental health
Multiple choice on the front steps
“What’s the worst case that you like best?”

I know, I know,
It’s not the bad
Think of all the shit that never happened
Still, I’m standing in the same spot
Caught in all the memories that I’d forgotten

All the life you have
What are you going to do with all the life you have

If only I had said what I had to say
If only the distance hadn’t got in the way
If every time that I started to fall
I’d have turned myself into a 5 foot wall
And just held still

All the life you have
What are you going to do with all the life you have
What are you going to do with all the life you have
What are you going to do with all the life you have

2. HURT

It stung just a little
When you said “I'm not sure where we’re going”
I said “take a left”
You said “that's not what I meant”
As if I didn’t know that you were gone
You were already gone

We’ve been so good at pretending
That we don’t have to talk about the ending
It’s an elephant
Behind a chain link fence
And I don’t want to touch it

If it’s going to hurt a lot
I’m not sure if I can do this again
If it’s going to hurt a lot
I’m not sure if I can do this again and again
And again and again
And again
And again
And again

It stung just a little
When you held back and still kept me going
If I close my eyes, I’ll believe it if I try
But you and I both know

That you get so high on revealing
A little bit of yourself with every line
Just enough to always keep me leaning in
Just enough to make me fall every time

If it’s going to hurt a lot
I’m not sure if I can do this again
If it’s going to hurt a lot
I’m not sure if I can do this again
If it’s going to hurt a lot
I’m not sure if I can do this again
If it’s going to hurt a lot
I’m not sure if I can do this again and again
And again and again

And again and again
Again and again
Again and again
Again and again
Again and again and again and again
And again and again
Again and again

Again and again
Again and again
Again and again
Again and again
Again and again and again and again
And again and again
Again and again

Again and again
Again and again
Again and again
Again and again

Again and again and again and again
Again and again and again and again
Again and again
Again

3. DOING MY BEST

I’m alright
Sometimes I think I’m getting better
Then I let the feeling drag me down again

You meet my eyes
But I fear you see right through me
So I let the room consume me
And I float above my head

I’m thinking,
I’ve been doing my best?
I’ve been doing my best
I’ve been doing my best?
I’ve been doing my best

We hold hands
And we hold ourselves together
But I wonder if you ever dream about being alone
I’d understand
I overthink my breathing
Wonder if everything I’m seeing is the best that it could be

Maybe I’ve been doing my best to keep my head above water
A little disappearance is the best I can offer
And I’ve been doing my best
I’ve been doing my best

Maybe I’ve been doing my best
I’ve been doing my best
I’ve been doing my best
I’ve been doing my best

I’ve been doing
I’ve been doing
I’ve been doing
I’ve been doing

4. INTERMISSION

[Instrumental]

5. GETAWAY CAR

Drunk at an open bar
Coating your lungs in tar
You said you saw the pain right behind my eyes
As if my transparency had earned you a prize

Wishing I’d stopped you, then
You opened your mouth again
Turning your anecdotes into a net
Holding me under your heady ascent

High and saying nothing
High and saying nothing
High and saying nothing
Nothing at all

Staring at the open sky
I said “I feel small tonight”
You took that to mean I was choked by my grief
But really it was an overwhelming relief

To be high and feeling nothing
High and feeling nothing
High and feeling nothing
Nothing at all
Nothing at all
Nothing at all

Standing here, two feet apart
I imagine myself in a getaway car

6. TEETH

I am brushing my teeth
After midnight, and you’re far away from me
Overhead lights make it look like I might be dying

Eyes shot with red
Searching my reflection
Sallow skin and full lips and a scar on her chin

My body is there
I know it
Though I can’t see her shape
I miss you as you’re leaving
Part of me just wishes it could stay

The same, the same, the same, the same, the same
The same, the same, the same, the same, the same

There are bugs on the ceiling
They’ve been stuck there for months
And I know that they’re there
I just try not to look up

We talked for twenty minutes
You in the midwest, and me here, in our bed
And I hate to be distracted
I love to hear you laughing

My body is here
I know it
Though I can’t see her shape
I miss you as you’re leaving
Part of me just wishes it could stay

The same, the same, the same, the same, the same
The same, the same, the same, the same, the same
The same, the same, the same, the same, the same
The same, the same, the same, the same, the same

I am brushing my teeth
After midnight, and you’re far away

7. PIECE OF YOU

You put your hand on the side of my face
Said “I’ve been feeling lonely”
And I said “I’ve been feeling the same”
And we looked at the sky

I get so in my way sometimes
It’s got me feeling like I’m the only one
Who can’t seem to get it right
That’s when you said

I don’t think you need me
The way you think you do
But that doesn’t stop me from holding on to
Every piece of you

I put my hand on the side of your face
I asked “are you feeling tired?”
Because I, I’ve been feeling the same
And I don’t want to fight it

And I don’t think you need me
The way you think you do
But that doesn’t stop me from holding on to
Every piece of you

I don’t think you need me
The way you think you do
But that doesn’t stop me from holding on to
Every piece of you

8. MOTH

I’m just trying to write a song
To make her feel like nothing’s wrong
But my tongue doesn’t move
When I force it to speak

I could open up my throat and
Force the air into a note
But a cloud doesn’t move
When you ask it to leave

But I’m not giving up on you
But I’m not giving up on you
I’m not giving up

There are books beside my bed
But I don’t reach for them
Instead, I’m fucking with my own head
And spinning in one place

You can tell when something’s wrong
I’m halfway here and I’m halfway gone
A puzzle-master putting all the pieces into place

You say,
“I’m not giving up on you, I’m not giving up on you,
I’m not giving up”

And if you go down again
I will always find your hand
Like a moth that can’t forget the outline of a flame

We can dance ‘till it shakes our core
Barefoot on a wooden floor
And I’ll pull out the splinters, ‘till it doesn’t hurt
At all

I’m not giving up on you
I’m not giving up on you
I’m not giving up

I’m not giving up on you
I’m not giving up on you
I’m not giving up

credits LYRICS LISTEN ↗

LITTLE DISAPPEARANCE
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Released 2020.

NOT MY BODY
OFF THE RAILS
GARDEN
GARDEN II
GOOD YEAR
DARKEST PLACES
KEEPING TIME

All songs written by Sam Lynch, except “Not My Body” and “Garden” written by Sam Lynch, Luca Fogale, and Paul Rigby

Produced by Samuel Woywitka (Tracks 1, 2, 3, 4, 6), Sean Wharton (Track 5), and Sam Lynch (Tracks 5, 7)
Additional editing by Stefan Nowarre

String arrangements by Dylan Phillips (Tracks 1, 4, 6)

Engineered by Samuel Woywitka (Tracks 1, 2, 3, 4, 6) and Olivia Quan (Tracks 5, 7)
Assistant engineering by Byron Edelmann (Tracks 1, 2, 3, 4, 6)
Additional engineering by Luca Fogale, Sean Wharton, and Sam Lynch

Mixed by Robbie Lackritz (Tracks 1, 2, 3, 4, 6) and Sean Wharton (Tracks 5, 7)

Mastered by Brock McFarlane at CPS Mastering

Recorded at Monarch Studio, Mixart Studio, Indica Studio, and Brantford House, on the unceded Indigenous lands of the Skwxwú7mesh-ulh Temíx̱w (Squamish), səl̓ilwətaɁɬ təməxʷ (Tsleil-Waututh), xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam), Kanien'keha:ka (Mohawk), and kʷikʷəƛ̓əm (Kwikwetlem) Nations

MUSICIANS

Harley Small: Organ, synth (7)
Isaac Symonds: Synth, guitar, keys (1, 2, 3, 4, 6)
Jasper Wrinch: Bass (7)
Josh Contant-Perdue: Drums (7)
Leif Vollebekk: Piano (1)
Luca Fogale: Wurli, piano, synth (3, 7)
Mishka Stein: Bass (1, 2, 3, 4, 6)
Quatuor Esca: Strings (1, 4, 6)
Sam Lynch: Vocals, guitars, organ, piano (All tracks)
Sean Wharton: Keys, synth, additional programming (5, 7)
Stephanie Chatman: Violin (5, 7)
Volodia Schneider: Drums (1, 2, 3, 4, 6)

NOT MY BODY

This is not my body
No, they made a mistake
Still every morning I move these arms and these legs
And I turn this head
And I look your way
And I try my best to say the things I think you want me to say
Is it all a mistake?

I’ve been looking for the answers in the palms of these hands
Can’t say for sure if the stars understand
In the mirror now
Just a pile of bones
A hollowed out version of someone I left on the side of the road
Where did everything go?

Maybe all that’s left are fragments of myself
Never feels like enough to be said
So I drown it out instead
Maybe all that’s left are fragments of myself
Will it ever feel like enough
Will it ever feel like—

OFF THE RAILS

Doctor says “take those pills,
You’ll be alright, I know that you will.
Nothing wrong with dulling the edges of a too-sharp mind,
You’ll be just fine”

So I choke them down,
And I lose my head
The sweet decline to the softened step
I turned my back, but I heard what they said
They said, “you sweet, sweet girl
Go back to bed”

Maybe I’m off the rails

Somewhere between here and Montreal
I lost my grip, I lost sight of it all
I slowed myself from a sprint to a crawl
And now my back is pinned against the wall

He talked me down, he told me I was good
He loved me still, like I knew that he would
In the shadows where I once stood
I see light and lines, and weathered wood

Maybe I’m off the rails

I can be as sweet as you need me to be
But don’t put me behind the wheel
Because I’m going to steer us right off the rails

Doctor says “take those pills,
You’ll be alright, I know that you will.
Nothing wrong with dulling the edges of a too-sharp mind,
You’ll be just fine”

GARDEN

Planted myself a garden
To colour in my point of view
It’s overgrown since I’ve started
Pulling petals,
Thinking to myself—

Does he love you
Does he love you or not

Roses rest on the counter
He’s holding me like there’s never been anybody else
What was mine is now ours
We’re dancing in the kitchen
And all the while I’m thinking
All the while—

Does he love you
Does he love you or not
Do I love you
Do I love you or not

Flowers keep growing higher
A cold daydream of growing older too
Half the world is on fire
Who am I to sit with my head in my hands
Just trying to understand
How I love you
Do I love you or not
Does he love you
Does he love you or not

GARDEN II

On the edge of it all
I scream to hear
A little part of my stays
A little disappears

I’m so sick of second-guessing
So sick of second-guessing
Every good thing that I see
Every good thing that happens to me

So I’m burying my burdens
I’m burying my burdens
There’s no need for hurting
No more
No more

GOOD YEAR

I thought that I saw you
Driving your car through the back parking lot
Where we used to shop
I said I was fine
I'm finding I’m not

I wander the aisles
Stare at the cereal for a while
Thought I heard you calling my name
The days, they came and went
All my time was spent with my head down

How do I start letting this go?
How will it end?
When will I know?
Don’t want to stay down
But scared of the fall
I’m a balancing act, that’s all
Been speaking in tongues
It’s touch and it’s go
With nowhere to run
And nothing to show
When I fall apart, nobody knows
It’s all spinning around me
I’ve got nothing to ground me
I went to the house
It all looks the same
The baby blue couch
The photo-less frames
And I’m just outside
But nothing is clear
My nose to the glass
And I can still hear you say

It’ll be a good year
It’ll be a good year
Darkest Places

I can hear your voice in my ear
It’s ringing loud, it’s sharp, it’s clear
Calling me back to yesteryear
Some cruel parade of youthful days, disappeared

Are you sick, or are you lonely?
Wasting all your hours only filling my head with regret

Then I said, “wait, no— I’m not finished here yet”
All this time I’ve been holding the space on your side of the bed

I can see how it’ll all play out
I’ll get the kids, and you’ll get the house
That’s how the world works now
Things get hard, we close the book, we burn it down

Are you sick, or are you lonely?
Wasting all your hours only filling my head with regret
Everything I could’ve said
Am I sick or am I lonely?
Wasting all my hours only filling my head with regret

Then I said, “wait, no— I’m not finished here yet”
All this time I’ve been holding the space on your side of the bed

I’ve been writing everyday,
Just trying to rid myself of any power you might have over me
Under my breath
Edge of my lips
Send a message, say you’re proud of everything that I am now
You’re holding to a photograph that’s faded
I try so hard to see the light behind your eyes, but how can I when you have only brought me to the darkest of places
The darkest of places
But I hold the space
I still hold the space for you

KEEPING TIME

I’ve been having trouble keeping time
A whole thought’s a half-step behind
I slow it down and seem to miss my spot
In the meantime

I’m running, tripping, busy buying-in to it all
A stop in New York wasn’t what I thought it’d be
Wish I could see it through your eyes
Wish I could see it through

I know the moon isn’t there for me to hold on to

Now I keep watching people pass me by
It pulls the focus from the corner of my eye
So I’m using horoscopes to plan my life
There’s got to be something bigger than me, than you

I know the moon isn’t there for me to hold on to
It’s true
I know the moon isn’t there for me to hold on to

Well I’ve been having trouble keeping time, keeping time, keeping time
And I’ve been having trouble keeping time, keeping time
Oh, I’ve been having trouble keeping time, keeping time, keeping time
And I’ve been having trouble, I’ve been having trouble

Everytime I close my eyes
Another year passes by
Everytime I close my eyes
Another year passes by
Everytime I close my eyes
Another year passes by
Everytime I close my eyes

It’s true
I know the moon isn’t there for me to hold on to

Sam Lynch

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